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Stream it or skip it: Artemis Foul

Disney+ is churning out so much original content! Scripted shows, reality competitions, shorts, documentaries, feature films, with dozens of other projects in development. I know how easy it is to get overwhelmed while scrolling through the seemingly endless home page of content. So in this series, I’ll be breaking down Disney+ plus originals to help you decide: Should I stream it, or skip it?

Artemis Fowl: Stream it, or Skip it?

Artemis Foul | © Disney

Type of Content: Film

Runtime: 2 hours

The Gist Of It: Child genius Artemis Fowl (Ferdia Shaw) is the son of a master thief (Colin Farrell). When his father is kidnapped by a fairy to reclaim a relic stolen by the Fowl family, Artemis teams up with his manservant (Nonso Anozie), his best friend and fellow child genius (Tamara Smart,) fairy soldier Holly Short (Lara McDonnell), and oversized dwarf thief Mulch (Josh Gad,) to save his father and evade the fairy police force, run by Commander Julius Root (Judi Dench).

Target Age: Pre-teen

A fantasy B squad | © Disney

Our Take: It makes a lot of sense that Disney put this planned theatrical release on Disney+ while they hold so desperately onto the Mulan live-action remake. This movie would have made no money in theaters, and they so obviously wanted this off their hands as quickly as possible. The film is a mess, a rare miss from director Kenneth Branagh, whose film credits include the live-action Cinderella. The movie is based on a series of popular fantasy novels and falls into the same traps and pitfalls of YA adaptations. Too rushed to appeal to new fans, and seems to only exist to set up what they are sure will be a greatly successful Hunger Games-style series. Artemis Fowl, our protagonist, is immediately snarky, rude, and all-around unlikeable, and, though I try to not be too mean to children and child actors, let’s just say not every pre-teen, unknown actor is Jacob Tremblay. Throw in an ugly CGI fantasy world and a weak plot, and you have another promising series wrecked by a lazy adaption.

When will we finally crack the sci-fi fantasy movie code? | © Disney

The High Point: Josh Gad is always a delight no matter the project

The Low Point: Many to choose from, but I’ll go with the complete unlikeability of the characters

Our Verdict: Skip it

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